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I was with a group of friends recently who, in a good-natured ribbing, labeled me as “high maintenance.”

We were at a conference together, staying at a gorgeous retreat center nestled in the hills of Orange County, CA. Only problem was our rooms didn’t have irons and I refuse to wear t-shirts when I travel.

(Nothing against t-shirts. One of my life mottos comes from an old high school football coach who used to tell us before a game, “Ya look good ya play good!” followed by, “Wise! We’re thirsty over here! Bring us some water!”)

Long story short, my collared shirts were desperately wrinkled so I made finding an iron my top priority. I was informed there was an iron on the property, and no one had else in the group of 35 had asked for it. SCORE.

It took a little while to track it down, which led to the “high-maintenance” label.

Again, completely good-natured and fun. But believe it or not, it wasn’t the first time I’d earned the label:

  • I don’t like camping. At all. Indoor plumbing and showers are one of the greatest inventions of humankind. We should all use them, early and often.
  • I prefer environments with air conditioning. If there’s not a blast of cold air inundating the room, I probably don’t want to be there.
  • I don’t do hotel “roomies.” This is mainly due to my room temperature preferences and if, by chance, I get stuck with a snorer, I will literally lie awake all night (I’m a light sleeper, too). The hours I should be sleeping will be spent plotting for ways to kill awaken my noisy bed neighbor.
  • I don’t drink cold water. It has to be room temperature or, ideally, a few degrees cooler. I think it has to do with the time I broke a tooth and, before it got fixed, took a large gulp of ice cold water. Let’s just say I never realized how sensitive the nerves in my teeth are.

There are other “quirks”, but hopefully these paint a picture of my mostly-reasonable demands.

See, I learned a few years ago it’s much easier to simply ask for what you want than suffer in silence.

I know there are going to be times when I just need to buck-up and deal with the situation. We can’t always get things the way we want them. This life ain’t Burger King, yo.

But I believe most times, if we’re simply willing to ask politely and persistently, we can get what we want without inconveniencing people.

The examples above are silly. They have no real consequences other than my momentary comfort. But here’s where asking for what you want has real-life consequences, some of them long-lasting and significant:

  1. Relationships. Sometimes people we’re in relationship with do things we don’t like. We can either ask them to stop doing those things (name-calling, clipping nails on the couch, showing up late to appointments, etc.), or we can suffer silently.
  2. Jobs. Our job path can stagnate if we don’t ask for what we want—more responsibility, a different position, more money, more vacation. Many people reading this post, right now, know what they want from their job but, for whatever reason, do not or will not ask for it.
  3. Calling. Different than a job, some folks will never take the risk to answer the question, “What’s my calling? What could be? What do I really want from life?” They’ll suffer silently in a job, never finding out what they really want to be doing. This, to me, is the most terrifying.

Here’s the thing: most of us know what we want. We can see it, taste it, hear it, and feel it. It’s tangible, real, right in front of us.

In my experience, so few of us are actually willing to ask for it.

Here’s what I want you to do. Call it an exercise in asking. I want you to find a situation where you can ask for what you really want (what’cha really, really want).

Pick something low-risk at first. The easiest place to start is the food and beverage industry. In fact, here’s an example from my own life from just a few days ago.

Me: Hi. This tastes a little watered down.

Barista: Do you want me to remake it or get you something different?

Me: Let’s try an iced Americano instead. Is that cool?

Barista: Yep! I’ll bring it right out to you. Sorry about that.

Me: That’s okay.

…And that was it! Mind you, I was nervous to go up to the counter (“what if she doesn’t like me?”), but I went anyways because I didn’t want to drink my watered down iced coffee.

I got what I wanted and the barista got to make something right. A win for both of us. Hooray winning!

Next time you’re at a restaurant, if you get something different than what you ordered, politely ask for your server to change it.

Then, when you want something a little more difficult, ask for the raise or promotion at work. What’s the worse that could happen?

Finally, if you really want to make some waves, ask yourself, “what do I want most out of this life?” Then, when you find the answers, have the courage to start living them out.

Bottom line: don’t settle. Settling is a poison that creeps into every fiber of your being and brings a slow, painful death.

Need help? Build a community who shares the same passion by signing up for the FREE THINKDIGITAL Academy Insiders List. You’ll get first access to the my first online social media course with exclusive bonuses. We’ll show you how to find your audience and build something online you can be proud of.


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One of my favorite questions to ask on virtually every survey I create is, “what’s your biggest social media-related challenge?”

Much like going into a voting booth and closing the door behind you, an online survey is a chance to let it all hang out (ew!). People give you their unvarnished opinion on web surveys. Especially if they’re anonymous. (There might even be a reality show idea in there somewhere.)

See this? This is response from a recent survey I conducted. Answers like this are what fuels me:

Biggest Social Media Problems

Yup.

This is real, raw, and all-too-common. Social media can be like a bad boyfriend or girlfriend: you know the relationship isn’t going anywhere, but you just can’t walk away!

Everyone Has the Same Social Media Problems

In most of my surveys, thousands of people all seem to be saying the same thing:

I don’t have the time I need to invest in social media. The time I do have, I’m not sure what I’m doing. The content I’m creating is falling flat. Help!

That’s why I’m working on a project that will help solve three of the biggest, most vexing social media problems:

  1. Not enough time to create content.
  2. Not enough engagement on content being created.
  3. Not enough people reading the content created.

It’s called the THINKDIGITAL Academy and it’s launching September 2013.

We’ve got an amazing group of folks trying out the content right now, but I can’t wait for the rest of the world to see it. This is my most personal project to-date. I’ve invested more blood, sweat, tears, and time into it than anything I’ve done before. You’re going to love it.

Nothing Works Unless You Do

The THINKDIGITAL Academy isn’t magic. It won’t do you any good unless you’re willing to put in some work. But if you’re tired of wasting time on social media without seeing results, THINKDIGITAL can help you.

Sign up for the Insiders List below and get access to the best bonuses, first crack at the seats (it’ll sell out), and get a front-row seat to the entire launch process (first video went out yesterday).

Play
#THINKDIGITAL

Click my face to be magically transported to iTunes.

I’m always amazed at how similar our struggles are when it comes to social media. We’re all asking the same questions, which means the answers still need to be found!

[Skip ahead to the show!]

Typically, I see people getting hung up in three main areas:

  1. Audience discovery. How do we find and connect with our online community?
  2. Content creation. How do we find time in our schedules to create engaging social media content?
  3. Content resonance. Once we do create content, how do we ensure it resonates with our community instead of falling flat?

In this episode of #THINKDIGITAL, you are the guest! I take a crack at answering the most common social media questions from the #THINKDIGITAL community, including:

  1. How do you discover your audience (and what do I do when you find them)?
  2. What are the best uses for Google+?
  3. How do you best set yourself up for social media success?
  4. How do you balance the crushing demands of content production? How does one keep up?

Don’t miss the burning questions YOU wanted answers for. I’m super proud of this episode because, let’s face it, there’s NO guest like YOU! (You’ll also be privy to the upcoming guest list and I share a project we’re building for the #THINKDIGITAL community and how you can get early access.)

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